don’t hate the playa, hate the game.

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it feels like love love love, and it feels like touch touch touch

so the macking game is interesting. and completely different for men and women, boy and girls. and apparently i have no game. in the literal and metaphorical way. because almost two weeks ago i decided that, just for sport, i would consciously get my mack on, if you will. i decided to get back into the game just to see how it goes. and to have fun, and get some attention and you know… be flirty. cause it’s fun. so i thought.

the concept is fun, until i realized that i apparently have no game. i never thought it something i needed. i talk and laugh, a lot, and loudly. and that is usually enough to get some flirtations going (and equals zero effort because its, uhhh just who i am). but a few times recently i have set out with my boys on a quest of getting my mack on. to see if i could. and my boys mack their shit. and i go home in a cab alone. (which is fine by me, don’t think i’d want my mackee to be in the cab with me anyway)

the point. instead of a full on mack session, it seems like i often just become the awkward third (or fifth) wheel in the situation. and im not sure why. well, i have some thoughts.

a) the LACK of interesting and attractive mackees. cute boys where ARE you? (besides behind the counter of my favorite ice cream shop). it seems that my boys usually find at least one mack worthy lady every time they try. i on the other hand, have not found a cute conscious flirt worthy boy. i suppose this could be for a few different reasons: i would like to meet someone to have a real connection with. so even though i am playing the game of mack as purely sport my mind cannot separate its normal flirt/crush/like worthy qualifications from the apparent low standards i must need to simply get my swerve on. also, maybe i’m hanging at the wrong mackppropriate venues. however, i believe a bar is the MOST mackppropriate place possible. hmp.

b) i am always hanging with boys when i try to get my mack on. maybe other boys don’t want to talk to the girl surrounded by other guys. but what sucks about THIS is that my presence exponentially increases the ‘game’ of my boys. sorry loves, its true. i am the trust factor. i am there to bond with the girl, and to let her express her ‘i don’t normally do this’ thoughts, and assure her that my boys are different, they are good guys (which they are). so while i am being passed over as the girl hanging with dudes, my dudes are macking hard. and successfully.

c)maybe i’m just not able to play the game when i’m not really in it to win it. i mean who really wants to be making out at the bar, or in the alley, or in the cab? or wake up wondering if there actually was something, or was it just physical. unfortuantely i say this with less umph that i should because sometimes the attention one gets from a mackee is just what one wants, needs, and enjoys.

and hell. maybe a mackee meeting would lead to a date. which i am apparently also ready to try on for size. ugh. this week dating just seems so… annoying.

what did i say? what did i say? ohh i didn’t mean it. what did i do? what did i do? ohh i didn’t mean it.

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