anyway. it was amazing. probably because i just did what i wanted the whole time. i flew solo a lot of it, because there was music i wanted to hear, and bands i wanted to see, regardless of what anyone wanted to do. forget the drinking, the partying, the spring break shenanigans, the cute boys… ok, wait, don’t forget the cute boys, i was there to just be in sunshine music heaven. and my mission was accomplished. with a lot of cute boys added it.

i came back more obsessed with music than ever. so obviously i had to make a mix to share!

this mix is about 80% bands i saw at sxsw and the rest just damn good new music that i couldn’t not put on here. i’ve included two SF bands that played at our SF Embassy Showcase at sxsw- geographer and the frail because they are great.

there’s a lot of stuff on here that came out today (you’re welcome) and a lot of stuff that didn’t. basically it’s like the greatest mix ever, and if you don’t think so, you’re wrong. ( :) ) most importantly if you like a song/band GO BUY THEIR ALBUM!!

with that, i dedicate this mix, postsxswmusicmania, to all the very wonderful, awkward, cute, shy, sensitive musician boys out there. they remind me everyday that people feel, care, and are cute. and that i’m allowed to swoon. because, i love you all.

postsxswmusicmania (click me! click me!)

(i’m lazy, so yes you get  screen shot of my itunes folder for the track listing)

it’s pretty awesome if i do say so myself.

…and she took out her shoelaces (click to download)

track listing:

badaboom- tapes ‘n tapes
fader- the temper trap
idiot heart- sunset rubdown
take off your sunglasses- ezra furman and the harpoons
waiting on you- sun airway
know better learn faster – thao with the get down stay down
an ear for baby- the thermals
not sick- tokyo police club
dlz- tv on the radio
becoming a jackal- villagers
red letter day- the get up kids
we’ve been had- the walkmen
16 days (acoustic)- whiskeytown
smithsonian liver- hot rod circuit
what a drag- bear hands
strictly game- harlem shakes
heat & hot water- arms
this bed- horse feathers
understand at all- cloud nothings
bruises to prove it- say hi
helplessness blues- fleet foxes
onion- sean hayes
answer to yourself- the soft pack

i like this one. it’s titled juryduty.

download it here.

’cause it’s that good.

here’s today’s.

sundayrain

Allo Darlin. My Heart is a Drummer.

As I am preparing myself to say farewell to my pride again
I remember how it was back then:
Id see you light a cigarette, and then you’d ask me to pass your asthma inhaler.
I’d say ‘Don’t you ever think about cancer?’
You’d say ‘Baby, you don’t know but my heart is as strong as a drummer’
‘My heart is as strong as a drummer’
You make me feel like apologising for being like this:
do I have to, say I’m sorry for my happiness?
You see it’s like loving ‘Graceland’, it’s not allowed to be but we know it’s everybody’s favourite
deep down in the place where, music makes you happiest.
In the place where my heart is a drummer,
in the place where my heart is a drummer.

…and when you call me, on the telephone my fingers will twist through the cord
and I’ll slide my feet up and down the wall,
…but I know that I’m stronger than you are
…but I know that I’m stronger than you are

…and when you call me, on the telephone my fingers will still twist through the cord
and I’ll slide my feet up and down the wall,
…but I know that I’m stronger than you are
…but I know that I’m stronger than you are.

http://allodarlin.com

don’t you want it. lovers.

there’s something so, well, raw about this song. despite the synth that, normally, suggests anything but raw. the lyrics, the authenticity in carolyn’s voice. it’s got a little bit of tegan and sara mets cyndie lauper with a new and modern freshness. it’s just real. and sweet. and yea.

i dunno. i like it. a lot. in a, “yea, that’s about right.” kind of way.

do you want it. lovers.

Earlier this summer, AOL created a position call the Ambassador of Lifestream.

What was it, you ask? Direct from the application, in AOL’s words:

“We’re looking for one very savvy individual to fill an important position. It’s an easy job because all you have to do is be yourself. There’s not a job like this anywhere else…guaranteed. Intrigued? Read on…
A Little About You
You’re the type of person we can see spending a lot of quality time with this summer. You have the perfect balance of charisma, insight and ambition. You might be thinking, “Sure, but what’s in it for me?”
Frankly, a lot.
But we’ll get to that later.
First, let’s talk more about you.
Like a bloodhound on the hunt, you’ve got an uncanny ability to sniff out new trends. You go with your gut. Like a sixth sense, it always leads the way.
Your enemy is the status quo. Status updates, however, are your friend. You judge others not only on the content of their character, but also on the content of their Tweets.
People listen to what you have to say, because they know that you know what’s up. You’re a social-media butterfly with the wingspan of a jumbo jet—you don’t flutter, you soar.
You’re comfortable in your own shoes and your friends love that about you.
Why? Because you’re cool, that’s why.
Like it’s your job.
Which brings us to why we’re here…
The Job
For two solid months you’ll be an integral part of the Lifestream Team and have the opportunity to work directly with Tim Armstrong, CEO of AOL. You’ll sit in high-level meetings and speak your mind to our top product engineers, marketers and executives. You’ll tell them what you like and what you don’t like about AOL products. We’re depending on you to tell it like it is, and we know that you will.
Ok, we know. You’re still wondering what’s in it for you.
Here’s The Deal
This is not your average summer internship. In fact, if we didn’t know better, we’d think this was some sort of Employment rickroll.
You, friend, will not only receive a paycheck, but you’ll also be living the bi-coastal lifestyle. A luxury apartment in San Francisco. A hip hotel in NYC.
Through AOL Lifestream, you’ll be sharing all your experiences with your social networks via Facebook updates, Tweets, Flickr uploads, Foursquare check-ins and YouTube videos. Give your followers a glimpse into the behind-the-scenes culture of AOL. Remember, your friends are our friends, too. And if our friends have something to say, we want to hear it.
We’ve been making a lot of changes around here and we’re not afraid to take risks. To inform those risks, we’re counting on you to bring us weekly dispatches from the frontlines of the latest pop culture trends. So throughout the summer, you’ll have in your possession VIP access to events around the country—the hottest clubs and restaurants, the most coveted live concerts, sporting events and industry social gatherings. Your loyal followers will benefit too, all because they know you.
You’ll get all this and more for allowing us to harness the awesome power that is you.

The initial application process asked for two 200 word essays, one about ourselves and one about business and social media.

Here are the essay questions, and my answers:

Tell us why you are perfect for the position (50% strategic adviser to the CEO about new products, features, experience, 50% Social Community Engagement Star)

Well, you said you cared what my friends think, so I decided to have THEM tell you why I’m perfect for this job. Not to worry, I didn’t skew the results by telling them why I needed their descriptions. I could sit here and list all the phenomenal things about me that make me the perfect candidate for the position, like having a Master’s Degree in Organizational and Cultural Communication, my impeccable tact, innovative strategic mind, influential managerial skills, and uncanny ability to connect with anyone… no, I won’t weigh their words with my personal opinion. I’ll let you hear it from them.

I posted the following on Twitter and Facebook: “Friends IRL and followers, please please help!! If you could describe/define me with a word or phrase (or a few) what would it (they) be?!”

And here are their answers, with no baiting, describing your perfect candidate:

Ebullient analytical extrovert. “Top of the phone chain.” Hopeful. Emphatic. Boisterously fun! Phenomenal laugh. Spirited. VIVACIOUS! Dubalicious! Authentic. Driven, engaging, a force of nature. Brassy! Down home genuine with authentic urban edge. Rosy, curly, springy, energy. Dreamy and enchanting. Perceptive. Vivacious [yes, again!]!

Perfectly yours,

Steph “charisma, insight and ambition” Dub

In 200 words or less, tell us how social media is changing the way people and businesses communicate (English only, please)

Humans need to connect. It’s what makes us different from other mammals. We connect, and we care. Care about what other people think, feel, and need. Social media provides the ultimate outlet for connection. It allows us to cross previously impermeable barriers to connection such as proximity, social status, and time. It allows us to feel important; heard; understood. That we matter; our opinion matters. This consequently dictates the need for a fresh economic model. Supply and demand is a well oiled framework based on rational variables that’s worked well for us. Until now. Social media has constructed a space for emotional influence in a previously rational economy. Our connections through social media validate our thoughts, feelings and needs; they validate our voice. For the the first time, anyone has access to influence the media. To contribute and be heard. This is a game changer for the ever shifting dichotomy between culturally determined media and media dictated society. As businesses contend to survive in the supply and demand competition they look towards media to provide insight on society’s desires. Social media has opened a direct line of communication between consumer and product. And the results are yet to be seen…

The semi-finals

Out of thousands of applicants, I made it through to the semi-finals. In the semi-finals (a two day period), we the applicants, completed a formal interview for the position with the Lifestream team leads, and has 24 hours to make a short (2 minutes or less) video of ourselves, discussing the following:

• Tell us why you’re the best person for this job.
• What kind of role does social media play in your life?
• What excites you the most about AOL Lifestream?

Below is my video, planned, recorded and edited in less than 24 hours.

Based on the interviews, the AOL selected their top 3 candidates and there I was in the finals. AOL made it clear that they would be excited and honored to work with any of the three, and left the rest up to a social media vote.

After days of technical issues, my greatest rally efforts possible, less than ideal voting interface and voter experiences- I didn’t get the AOL Ambassador of Lifestream position.

But over all, I can’t say that I would have changed anything whatsoever. It was a fabulous lesson in believing in and trusting myself and my abilities, being open to asking for help, working on a quick paced creative project and receiving an overwhelming amount of love and support from a community of family, friends, and strangers.

Thanks again to EVERYONE for EVERYTHING!

Well, you said you cared what my friends think, so I decided to have
THEM tell you why I’m perfect for this job. Not to worry, I didn’t
skew the results by telling them why I needed their description. I
could sit here and list all the phenomenal things about me that make
me the perfect candidate for the position, like having my Master’s
Degree in Organizational and Cultural Communication, my impeccable
tact, innovative strategic mind, influential managerial skills,
uncanny ability to connect with anyone… no, I won’t weigh their
words with my personal opinion. I’ll let you hear it from them.

I posted the following on Twitter and Facebook: Friends IRL and
followers, please please help!! If you could describe/define me with a
word or phrase (or a few) what would it (they) be?!

And here are their answers, with no baiting, describing your perfect candidate:
Ebullient analytical extrovert. “Top of the phone chain.” Hopeful.
Emphatic. Boisterously fun! Phenomenal laugh. Spirited. VIVACIOUS!
Dubalicious! Authentic. Driven, engaging, a force of nature. Brassy!
Down home genuine with authentic urban edge. Rosy, curly, springy,
energy. Dreamy and enchanting. Perceptive. Vivacious [again!]!

Perfectly yours,
Steph “charisma, insight and ambition” Dub

and what i wasn’t prepared for when i asked the lighthearted question to my network of friends was the kindness and greatness of their responses. it’s not often that we ask what other people think of us. maybe it’s because we don’t really want to know. maybe it’s because we don’t care. i’m not sure why. but sometimes it really is amazing to find out how other people think of you. it’s amazing when their responses are so genuine, and align with who you strive to be as a person.

so at that point in the application process, i said even if i don’t get any further, just seeing and feeling those responses was gift enough.

and then i made it to the semi-finalists, and now finalists. and i’m rallying and reaching out, and asking for help (which is a whole nother lesson being learned). and the responses are outrageously awesome. i feel so loved and supported and understood. from every person that “got it” that i’d be perfect for this job. from everyone that sent the link to strangers. from every stranger that has voted. you’re all so wonderful.

often times, when we want something, and need “more” to get it, we forget the people that have already given to us. we inadvertently punish them for not giving enough. and through this process i refuse to let that happen. so, one day into the 4 day process i want to say THANK YOU. to every one of my friends, family members, strangers, friends of friends, friends of family. YOU’RE ALL AMAZING. thank you so much.

here’s one of the facebook messages that inspired this post:
Laura Liu:…i thought about why i liked your video better than the other two. social media is not part of your job, it’s your PA—SSION (said with your chicago accent in my head). for them, it’s part of their job and their social life. for you, it’s about how to move your PA—SSION for your radio show forward, which has nothing to do with your day job. …just thought i would point that out to everyone who should be voting for you. wish i could’ve left that comment on the voting website.

so thank you all. for everything you’ve done already. you’re an amazing bunch and i’m so grateful.

NOW- let’s rally for three more days. there’s no way i’m NOT going to get this ;)

if you haven’t yet please VOTE FOR ME FOR AMBASSADOR OF LIFESTREAM! <3

talib and estelle just own this shit.

listen and love life.

reflection eternal. midnight hour, feat. estelle.

@stephdub: it’s so funny how fear and doubt can creep in to make us question something that we are batshit excited about. ENOUGH! Banish! I’m AWESOME!

i used this tweet in effort to step away from unneeded and unwanted fear about something so that i was so excited about. and it worked. i went forward with what i was feeling insecure about. and LET ME TELL YOU, IT WORKED. SOME AWESOME RESULTS came directly from ignoring the fear. and embracing the excitement.

a few days later i was having an amazing conversation about synchronicity with a close friend. and we were talking about how we often dismiss signs from the universe, or where ever, as coincidence. and in fact, nothing is coincidence. it’s all connected. and the more we begin to notice the signs. the more they come. and the more positive things continue to happen.

i get a daily email called the dailyOM. it’s great. it’s a little piece of perspective in my inbox everyday.  today i was reading my dailyOMs from the last few days, and what do i find? THIS.

synchronicity, my dear friends. it’s all a sign.

June 8, 2010
Translating Our Feelings
Are You Excited Or Scared?

Often times when trying something new, we feel scared when in actuality we may be excited. Reframe your thoughts.

When new challenges and opportunities show up in our lives, we may diagnose ourselves as feeling scared when what we really feel is excited. Often we have not been taught how to welcome the thrill of a new opportunity, and so we opt to back off, indulging our anxiety instead of awakening our courage. One way to inspire ourselves to embrace the opportunities that come our way is to look more deeply into our feelings and see that butterflies in our stomach or a rapidly beating heart are not necessarily a sign that we are afraid. Those very same feelings can be translated as excitement, curiosity, passion, and even love.

There is nothing wrong with being afraid as long as we do not let it stop us from doing the things that excite us. Most of us assume that brave people are fearless, but the truth is that they are simply more comfortable with fear because they face it on a regular basis. The more we do this, the more we feel excitement in the face of challenges rather than anxiety. The more we cultivate our ability to move forward instead of backing off, the more we trust ourselves to be able to handle the new opportunity, whether it’s a new job, an exciting move, or a relationship. When we feel our fear, we can remind ourselves that maybe we are actually just excited. We can assure ourselves that this opportunity has come our way because we are meant to take it.

Framing things just a little differently can dramatically shift our mental state from one of resistance to one of openness. We can practice this new way of seeing things by saying aloud: I am really excited about this job interview. I am really looking forward to going on a date with this amazing person. I am excited to have the opportunity to do something I have never done before. As we do this, we will feel our energy shift from fear, which paralyzes, to excitement, which empowers us to direct all that energy in the service of moving forward, growing, and learning.